RESPECT THERAPY by Shiala

RESPECT THERAPY

VIEW OF HUMAN NATURE
Respect means taking someone’s feeling, needs, thoughts, ideas, wishes and preferences into coniderstion. We might also say it means taking all of these seriously and giving them worth and value. In fact, giving someone respect seems similar to valuing them and their thoughts, feelings, etc. It also seems to include acknowledging them, listening to them, being truthful with them, and accepting their individuality and idiosyncrasies. Respect can be shown through behavior and it can also be felt. We can act in ways which are considered respectful, yet we can also feel respect for someone and feel respected by someone. Because it is possible to act in ways that do not reflect how we really feel, the feeling of respect is more important that the behavior without the feeling. When the feeling is there, the behavior will naturally follow.
DEVELOPMENT OF MALADAPTIVE BEHAVIOR
Going back in time, respect played an important role in survival. If we think of a small tribe wandering in the desert we can imagine that a person not respect by anyone could be left behind and die. Such a person was considered to have no worth, no importance, no value to the group. This, I believe is the function of our psychological need to feel respected. Servants and employees and have salesmen constantly calling on him and catering to him, yet not be respected in the least. Someone could also make a lot of money through having a particular talent which is valued, such as being able to dunk a basketball yet not really respected, perhaps because of the way he treats others. Still, there is a value to respect which money can’t buy. Though someone’s life might not depend on it, there are times, many times in fact, when another person has the chance to make a personal decision-a judgement call. When that person feels sincere respect for someone else, they will make a different decision than if they feel no respect, even if they have customarily shown a false, pseudo-respect to the person. We can all sense whether we are respected or not. This holds true for those with money and power as well. Moreover, it is quite possible that those who pursue money are actually trying to gain a type of respect that never have truly felt. When we are respected we gain the voluntary cooperation of people. We don’t have to use as much of our energy and resources trying to get our needs met. When people respect one another there are fewer conflicts.
GOALS OF THE THERAPIST
Respect therapy seeks to help the client live with a respectful life. It serves to eliminate the need for power and money to gain respect from others.

FUNCTION OF THE THERAPIST
The major function of the therapist in respect therapy is being a model. He or She serves as a model to the clients in a way that he or she is taking that person’s feelings, need, thoughts into consideration.
The therapist should also be attentive to what they are saying. Make eye contact with them when they are talking and don't be day dreaming. Eye contact is the best way to show interest. Give them time to say what it is they want to say.
MAJOR METODS AND TECHNIQUES
Wait time- Give them time to say what it is they want to say
“How would you feel if” question- for them to have self reflection
APPLICATION
Applying Respect to ECED age Chilren
We all want our children to be respectful. Most would agree that this starts at home with the parents demonstrating respect to their children. However, many of us still fail to show our children respect, thus missing an important opportunity to cultivate respect in them. Showing respect to our children is not difficult, but sometimes it takes more time and thoughtfulness than we feel we have.

1
Stop what you are doing to pay attention to your child when he asks something of you. If this is not possible, ask him to wait a few minutes until you can give him your full attention.
2
Look your child in the eye when you are talking with her. This will let her know that you are not too busy to listen and that she matters to you.
3
Consider your child's requests thoughtfully instead of just blowing him off. Help them to understand that you are aware of his desires and concerns even if they cannot be fulfilled or addressed now or in the future.
4
Stop and think about the behavior your child is exhibiting that may be bothering you. Is it age appropriate? Does it relate to a frustration the child is having that may be hard for an adult to understand? Deal with the child in a kind but firm manner.
5
Speak kindly to your children whenever possible. Imagine you are speaking to someone else's child before responding in anger or frustration to your own child, this may temper the verbal blow you are about to hand out.